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Pretty pleaseSaturday October 18, 2008 - 05:37pm (PDT) Permanent Link
- Hopefully this is a good blog.
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I made $50 last week at work. I really need to do something. My friend April suggested looking for another salon and work at both. My employers aren't holding up their end getting my supplies and getting the word out with mailers. I have spent quite a bit of money I don't have on flyers and brochures that is customarily the responsibility of the salon. The good news it that I am almost booked solid for Tuesday. This could be my best week. My credit cards are not getting paid now so my credit will crap out on me soon. I think I would like to file bankruptcy. My wife doesn't because she claims it will cost her employment opportunities. I need to get off my butt and get a part-time evening job. I hear there are some cool oriental salons I can work in.
I was quite irresponsible at the Mercantile last night. I will disclose the details privately for those who are interested. I need to stop going there I think. At least for a while. I guess I am becoming an attention whore.
I have a new friend named Jenni B. She is in the early stages of transition and I would like my friends to be there for her. Especially you UK girls. If you read her latest blog, you will understand what I'm talking about.
I believe I could use some peer pressure here to lose weight. When I started transition, I started jogging. Then I was able to get on the South Beach program. It is really difficult right now without money. My jogging shoes blew out on me too. I was jogging at 5 miles per day at least 5 days a week. I was at my lowest weight in a long time. I have gained 30+ pounds since the end of May 2006. It is time for me to get serious. I would like to get a gym membership and get on the weight watchers plan. My current plan is to walk the 5 miles a day. I have a lower back pain. I need the strengthen the muscles in my lower back.
Again. Here are in my opinion some priorities for transition.
Gather and study as many on-line resources as possible and get on at least one on-line forum like Susan's place or Laura's Playground.
See a gender therapist.
Get yourself healthy.
Learn your female voice and mannerisms.
Find a TG support group near where you live.
Did I mention learn your female voice?
Blend. Learn what a majority of women wear on certain weather conditions. If you don't want to be outed, don't wear slutty clothes in public. If you don't mind the attention then go for it.
If your job doesn't seem likely to keep you on board, seek education to a more suitable career for the new you.
Legally change your name.
Network, network, network. It is amazing how many T-girls who don't understand the value of communication with others like them. It's ok. It's what girls do. It doesn't even have to be anything specific. It could just be silly, mundane conversation. Network with GG's too. After all, you are one of them, or at least you will appear to be.
Don't expect a magical change overnight. You have a lot of old habits to break and it's not always easy. If you really want womanhood 101, I suggest beauty school as an Esthetician. It's only about 6 months and around $7K for a good lesson.
Building upon the inclusive Hate Crimes legislation that passed the House of Representatives in the last Congress, there may well be the first inclusive legislation on employment non-discrimination as well this session.
This year’s visit by NTAC will be May 16 - 17, with a plenary training session on Tuesday, May 15, 2007. However, NTAC will not be the only group lobbying that week.
Ok. I personally feel they should be trying to get the US govt. to identify us as our gender that we present via showing the change on the gender marker for social security. I guess I may have to lobby that one.
Please add anything I left out.
Have a great Sunday!
Robyn
Sunday April 22, 2007 - 12:37pm (PDT) Permanent Link | 2 Comments - Transition help
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Ok. I will continue a blog a friend started on transitioning. I will share my info and links.
I strongly recommend the Andrea James Finding Your Female Voice for voice training. Practice 1 hour a day until you are finished. It's ok to start using your voice after about 3 months and just smile, be outgoing and upbeat, enunciate, and use reflections and gestures and you will be good to go.
You can find this on tsroadmap.com and other important things about transition.
annelawrence.com for other good transition information including srs results.
classykelli.com for a good long story with a lot of pics of a girl in my region who started as a cross dresser and ended with srs. she is supposedly still in progress but hasn't posted in a few months. She does answer emails promptly, but be warned- if you ask anything she answered on her site, she will bite your head off.
lynnconway.com for a lot of transitioning information
I recommend doing a search on line for gaffs to keep your outie and innie
Don't wear high heels until you can walk in lower ones.
lauras_playground.com for trans-gender news, links, and forums
susans.org for their forum and links
brokenbutterfly yahoo group if you had a botched srs and want to talk about it with others who had the same experience.
Dr. Chettawut girls yahoo group for those interested in having him do your srs. The other girls are very helpful and supportive. You can link to Denise on my friends list to get linked to it.
Dr. Suporn has a yahoo group as well.
Note: I have learned of several girls with botched surgeries from Marcie Bowers
urnotalone.com to make a profile on a tg site and if you want a change of pace you can join their chat room.
Blend blend blend You can wear your slutty stuff to the nightclub. If you want to blend, learn to dress like the other women.
Kevyn Aucoin has two excellent make up books you can even buy them used on amazon.com Face Forward and Making Faces
Do get pedicures and manicures. They don't really care what you look like. They want your money.
Find someone to do your hair and teach you the things you didn't get to learn as a young girl. I had a stylist that helped me style my hair to have a more feminine side profile. Don't be afraid to wear clip on ponytails. That is one on my 360 pic. You can also do what many other women are doing if you have thin hair and relatively short hair. Have a weave done. There is a local gal in my region who makes custom hair pieces at a modest price too.
See an Esthetician for instructions on skin care.
To save some time on hair removal to start living a touch sooner I recommend laser. Once the hair has been removed and is on a new growth cycle you can start electrolysis.
Many girls are in a hurry to start hormones. It is highly common for transsexuals to lose their jobs. I recommend working on your hair removal, voice, and mannerisms prior to hormones.
Seek a gender therapist before hormones.
It's ok to purchase clothes from the thrift store. Believe it or not you can find some really nice stuff.
Ross and Wal Mart are nice too. I found nice inexpensive adhesive bra's there. They recently changed the quality and now their adhesive bra is crap. I enjoyed water bras from there too.
I recommend professional mineral make up too. Qvoe, Jane Iredale, and another real popular one I will have to look up cuz I forgot the name. Not bare minerals.
For those with a belly, I recommend a tummy tucker.
Post if you have any other questions or suggestions I left out.
Wednesday April 11, 2007 - 08:59am (PDT) Permanent Link | 3 Comments - Bill to make problems for kids to join school clubs
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Bill would require parents' permission for kids to join school clubs
Published 04/07/2007 By HANK HAYES
Parents would have to write up a permission slip to allow their kids to participate in school clubs and organizations under a bill scheduled to be considered by Tennessee legislative committees.
Not everyone is giving a thumbs-up to state Rep. Matthew Hill's proposed legislation coming before lawmakers on the House and Senate Education committees Wednesday.
Hill, R-Jonesborough, said the idea for the bill came from feedback he got while campaigning for re-election last fall.
"I had people all the time saying ‘We need more parental involvement in schools' ... and I hear that from administration folks and teachers," Hill said.
But some interest groups are lining up against Hill's bill.
Students have access to about 50 clubs at Kingsport's Dobyns-Bennett High School - everything from the Junior Statesmen of America to the Art Club.
The man who oversees those clubs, D-B Assistant Principal and Activities Director Mike Fulkerson, said Hill's measure could actually hurt student involvement in clubs. Right now, he said, all the clubs are open to any student with a particular interest.
"Signing a form doesn't necessarily increase parent involvement," Fulkerson said. "Just my first impression ... it seems like it would have a slight reduction on enrollment in our clubs and activities. Students are not as likely to return permission forms. You might see an increase in forgery. Those are just things you need to be aware of."
Fulkerson pointed out research shows that students who are more engaged in school activities are generally more successful academically.
"We encourage participation. It's a good thing for students to be involved in something," he said.
Three statewide groups - the Tennessee Transgender Political Coalition (TTPC), American Civil Liberties Union and Tennessee Equality Project - are taking an active political stance against Hill's measure.
On its political action Web site (www.ttgpac.com), TTPC says the bill would destroy so-called "Gay-Straight Alliances (GSAs)" in public schools.
"GSAs provide a safe space and peer support for gay, lesbian, transgender (GLBT) and bisexual students and their straight friends, while promoting self-respect and tolerance, and stand against GLBT bullying and harassment," said a position statement on the Web site. "Several schools across Tennessee already have GSAs, and they are providing an important service for GLBT youth in the state."
Hill admitted the bill could have a negative impact on other clubs.
"It could also have negative impact on Fellowship of Christian Athletes. That's not my intent. I love the FCA. ... The intent of the bill is not to prop up one or another organization. ... The bottom line is if a parent does not want a child to participate in a club, they have the responsibility to do that. These are minor children."
Hill indicated the Tennessee Education Association was opposed to the original version of the bill, which would have required each school to notify parents by letter of all clubs or organizations available to students. That part of the bill was eliminated because of its expense. There are about 300,000 children in grades 9-12 statewide, according to the state's Fiscal Review Office.
Hill said a number of lawmakers are getting behind his bill.
"I actually have Democrats on the (education) committee who are actually supporting the bill, like Rep. Tommie Brown from Chattanooga. ... She thought it was a great idea, and that surprised a lot of people," he said.
For more information go to www.legislature.state.tn.us and click on "Legislation." The bill's number is HB0905.
Comments:
Monday April 9, 2007 - 09:39am (PDT) Permanent Link - Entry for April 07, 2007
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Trans ID at Issue in Custody CaseBy: ARTHUR S. LEONARD04/05/2007A trial judge's decision to switch custody of two young boys from their mother, who supports her older son's apparent desire to dress and act as a girl, to their father, who rejects the idea that his son is transsexual, has been upheld by an Ohio appeals court.
The March 23 opinion, written by 7th District Appellate Judge Cheryl L. Waite, reflects uncertainty about how early in life it can be said that somebody is transsexual.Advertisementvar bnum=new Number(Math.floor(99999999 * Math.random())+1); document.write('');
V.S. and K.S. Smith married in 1994, and had two sons, born in 1994 and 1998. Under the terms of their 2001 divorce, it was determined the boys would live with their mother, V.S.
The older boy had already displayed signs of gender non-conformity at that point, according to V.S., although the father denied having noticed anything. His contact, however, with the boy was limited over the following years.
The boy asked his mother to call him by a female name and indicated a preference to wear girl's clothing. V.S., who did some research on transsexuality and concluded that her son was transsexual, complied with his requests. As well, she took him to an adult transsexual support group, began researching the appropriate age to provide hormone treatments and gender reassignment surgery, and moved the family to a different town where she could register her son in school as a girl.
It was the move and school registration that set K.S. in motion. He strongly opposed the idea that his son might be transsexual, arguing that the boy was too young to reach such a conclusion. He petitioned the court to gain residential custody of both boys, noting their close fraternal bonding as reason to keep them together.
V.S., claiming the rights of a natural mother and legal parent, insisted that the court had no business interfering with her decisions about how to raise her son. But, she had never consulted any experts on gender identity in reaching her conclusion that her son was transsexual.
Judge Waite's opinion suggests that the trial judge had conducted an extensive investigation into gender identity, hearing from two medical experts presented by each party, and then appointing a neutral expert. The trial judge concluded it was premature to label the boy's gender identity, disagreeing with his own appointed neutral expert to some extent.
From the evidence summarized in Waite's opinion, it seems difficult to say whether the boy is a transvestite or a transsexual, since in some respects he identified as a boy and happily engaged in play characteristic of pre-teen boys. In other situations, he identified as a girl, seeking to dress and be addressed with a female name.
In light of the mixed expert testimony and the child's young age, as well as the judge's conclusion that the mother would prove unreliable in complying with the court's order to refrain from encouraging the boy to develop his feminine identity, a change of custody was granted to the father.
V.S. had violated an interim order requiring that the boy not dress or be treated as a girl pending disposition of the case. Suspecting that the mother would defy that order, K.S. instigated surveillance, and presented evidence that during a swimming outing V.S. let the boy wear a bikini and introduced him by the female name he favored.
The record makes clear that the trial judge went to great lengths in determining the correct thing to do. That care made it unlikely that an appeals court would reverse, since trial courts are accorded great deference in their fact-finding.
The court of appeals rejected V.S.'s argument that the change in custody violated Ohio's traditional approach on such matters. Waite noted that the developing situation involving the boy's gender identity constituted changed circumstances that justified reopening the custody issue. The appeals court upheld the conclusion that any harm from changing the boy's custody was significantly outweighed by putting the boy in an environment where his gender non-conformity was not actively encouraged.
The court was clearly assuming that it is in the best interest of the child to develop a gender identity consistent with his birth-assigned sex, a point it evidently saw as not open to debate. The court acknowledged that V.S. was acting in what she thought was the child's best interests and did not question her sincerity.
V.S. represented herself without a lawyer for the appeal, while her former husband, K.S., had an attorney, but it is hard to judge whether the outcome was affected by her lack of professional advocacy.©GayCityNews 2007Saturday April 7, 2007 - 06:54am (PDT) Permanent Link | 3 Comments
