*) A couple were lying in bed, and the man says," Im going to make you the happiest woman in the world". The woman replies........."Ill miss you..."

*)"Its just too hot to wear clothes today", Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, "honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?"

"Probably that I married you for your money", she replied.

*)A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary. On their special day a good fairy came to them and said that because they had been so good that each one of them could have one wish.

The wife wished for a trip around the world with her husband.

WHOOSH! Immediatly she had airline/cruise tickets in her hands.

The man wished for a female companion 30 years younger......

WHOOSH!....immediatly he turned ninety!!!

Gotta love that fairy.

*)Dear lord,

I pray for wisdom to understand my man. Love to forgive him, and patience for his moods. Because Lord, if I pray for strength, Ill beat him to death.

AMEN

You are the mother I received the day i wed your son,

and I would like to thank you for the things that you have done.

Youve given me a gracious man with whom I share my life,

you are his loving mother, and i his lucky wife.

You used to pat his little head, and now i hold his hand,

youve raised in love a little boy, and gave to me a man.

There, ive said it. Now i can rest my thoughts.

This is my mother-inlaw, Patricia. She passed away very unexpectedly, and suddenly on her way home from Dallas, with her son, my husband, Robert. She passed away on my daughters 10th birthday, May, 27. I will always have regrets, and things that I never got to say. Especially thank you, for giving me my husband. Dont know how to keep it together without you Pat. I love you.

R.I.P. 5/27/2007

To whom it may concern:

I am hereby officially tendering my resignation as an adult. I have decided I would like to accept the responsibilities of an 8 year old again.

I want to go to McDonald's and think that it's a four star restaurant.

I want to sail sticks accross a fresh mud puddle and make ripples with rocks.

I want to think M&M's are better than money because you can eat them.

I want to play dodge ball at recess and paint with water colors in art.

I want to lye under a big oak tree and run a lemon-ade stand with my friends on a hot summer's day.

I want to return to a time when life was simple. When all you knew were colors, multiplacation tables, and nursery rhymes, but that didnt bother you, because you did't know what you didnt know ,and you didnt care. Alls you knew was to be happy because you were blissfully unaware of all the things that should make you worried.

I want to think the world is fair. That everyone is honest and good.

I want to believe that anything is possible. Somewhere in our youth we matured and learned too much. There are nuclear weapons, war, prejudice, and abused children. Lies, unhappy marriages, illness, pain, and death. A world where companies poison our water and soil, and children kill.

What happened to the time when we thought that everyone would live forever, because we didnt grasp the concept of death? When the worst thing in the world was if someone took the jump rope from you, or picked you last for kickball.

I want to be oblivious to the complexities of life and be overly excited by the little things again.

I want to return to the days when children played hide and go seek outside instead of beibg glued to a television, when video games were as harmless as packman...instead of spine-ripping, blood spattering mind numbing games like Mortal Combat, and TV still had some shows on that wernt about sex, killing, and lies.

I remember being naive and thinking everyone was happy because I was. Afternoons were spent climbing trees and fences and riding my bike. I never worried about time, bills, or where I was going to find the money to fix my own car. I used to wonder what I was going to do or be when I grew up, not worry about what Ill do if this doesnt work out. I want to live simple again.

I dont want my days to consist of computer crashes, mountains of paperwork, depressing news, how to survive more days in the month than there is money in the bank, doctor bills, gossip, illness, and loss of loved ones.

I want to believe in the power of a smile, hug, a kind word, truth, justice, peace, dreams, imagination, mankind and making angels in the snow.

So....heres my check book and car keys, my credit card bills and my 401K statements. I am officially resigning from adulthood.

And if you want to discuss this further, you'll have to catch me, cause, TAG! Your it!!!!