used to be unsure of  love and how it would affect me.....
i neva even opened up in fear it would reject me
and just when i found it.....things happened as i expected
i was left shocked, broken, alone, and regretting....
then love came again and happened through a friend....it was kinda awkward but it was still worth it in the end.....i learned alot about myself and what i was really made of....becuse i will never and even then i refused 2 be a fool for love.
a third time love will come and when it does ill run.....with arm wide open ill accept and in my heart it will 4ever be kept.
i cant wait for the one whos meant to love me...hold me close and rock me softly.....the one who ill tell my dreams.....the one who really understands me.....i cant wait to share my deepest darkest secrets with sum1 whom i kno they will be kept....
sum1 i can care 4.
sum1 i can learn about....and who can learn me....
i wana love like that sum1 never thought possible....from every hair folicle and freckle 2 the very imperfectipons that make them beautifully unique....
my love will be patient...my love will be kind....it will be honest....not self forfilling or jealous
i cant wait 4 love....
i stopped 2 think that maybe my sum1 isnt ready 4 me yet......maybe they havent been through enough hurt to really enjoy the sunshine.....so god is making me wait......but ill wait gladley because i ko what ive been through and the impact its had on me.........so.....
4 love ill wait........

herez a song i wrote read it and tell me wat u think......

i made the biggest mistake of my life walkin, away from bein ya wife,

we coulda had the live i wanted 2 live....u, me and 2 kidz

but here i am wishin and hopin and dreamin that maybe 1 day u could find a reason, 2 let me bak in...............2 start all ova again 

im not sure wat i waz thinkin doin all that lyin  and cryin, deniyin i sorry baby i waz wrong..... ...itz not done...........im still thinkin on it!

 

my mind iz racin yet my soul iz complacent, im trying 2 move forward but itz almost irrelevent. Itz crazy how the past can predict ya future if u let it......shit......my heart izz beating about a million miles a min......deep recolection of the thingz ive done leads 2 regret of the warz ive lost but my few battles won.....my feet move 2 the unsteady beat of her broken drum az if ima flower that bloomz in her presence...i need her, shez da sun. She haz my heart yet i got the key so itz my fault that she haz the best of me. all thiz confusion and all this joy brought at the handz of sum 1 to whom im merely a toy. she playz my emotionz and leadz me on just 2 leave me broken and undone......yes.....undone and incomplete.......thus concludez my honesty

..........................................Life iz soo crazzy u neva know wat 2 expect.....Just when I though everything in my life waz a mess,things r turning around.....I kinda had sum issues 2 deal with frm my past and I did wat i had 2 do (4giv &4get)....... At 1 point in life I was so hurt, upset, and afraid I didnt know how 2 respond,but now im doin GREAT!! LOL I love where i am in life...I love the ppl I choose 2 surround myself with.....The positive energy they give iz WONDERFUL!! im just sooooooo damn happy!!.....EVERYTHING IZZ EVERYTHING AND I LOVE WHERE IM @