UNTITLED…BY NIDHAMU

I was looking forward

you let your fingers
 slide down my ass
 you touched and felt..
 and felt me get wet
 your smile triumphant
 let me know you knew
 exactly the effect
 your nakedness had on me
 
 my tongue flickered involuntarily
 and I new I'd have to taste you
 
 I wanted to fill your every crevice
 The space between your neck and ear
 Your collarbone
 Your nipples that speak hard
 And sound soft
 
 My mouth covered your breasts
 In silent ecstasy
 And I could hear your
 Not so silent moan of pleasure
 But dear god I have to taste you

I Am What I Am...

Choice, Orientation, Fate…. Why am I attracted to other women? Why am I in love with my best friend?  Am I normal? What’s wrong with me?

These are some of the questions that a lot of women agonize over in the long journey to attaining self identity and self knowledge. It doesn’t help if there is no visibility, acknowledgment and acceptance of others who have undertaken the same journey.

Some call it a matter of choice. It can be. But  choice made after agonizing soul searching, sleepless nights and very stressful days often to the point of breakdown. And so to dismiss it as merely a “choice that one can change” is both unreasonable, impractical, ignorant and inhumane.

Others accept that it is Orientation. We are born this way. It is in our genes, in our blood to be attracted to other women. In fact, there have been some scientific studies aimed at supporting this theory. So again to dismiss Lesbians, Gay or Bi women (in fact all gay people) as “inherently disordered” is again displaying ignorance and a high level of intolerable cruelty.

Other’s call it fate, tradition, culture etc… It is not fate. It can be in the tradition or culture (as in some tribes in Kenya) but this is hardly fate. And while we acknowledge that in tradition, there have been instances where women have lived with women due to cultural demands, we also reiterate that there are many women who have done so because they wanted to. The tradition or specific culture offered them opportunity to live as Lesbians, Gay and Bi women. The traditional set-up (which has since been destroyed in most cases) affirmed, accepted and provided these women an environment where there were free to be themselves.

This is sorely lacking in post modern Kenya. Whether by choice, Orientation, Fate etc… It is a fact that Lesbian, Gay and Bi women exist in our society. Continual denial of our presence and who we are is a violation of our human rights. Whatever the reason, we exist, we are here and we are proud to be who we are.