well its been 6 months since i last wrote. so here's a little update. my last court date was suppose to be 1-6-07 but my ex decided not to go thru with it. all he wanted was not to pay child support or pay for insurance for the kids. and to tell you the truth i was so depressed and wanting to die so much that i said ok. i couldnt handle my babies crying any longer. everything is going quite well so far with the kids and the ex. actually me and the x get along real good and his wife got help with her bi-polar and she is ok.... my daughter even likes doing things with her now. they both (kids) like the fact that we do week/week with their daddy. he only lives about 1.5 miles from me so its not too bad. had it kinda rough with the school activities, my ex mom in law never would tell me when things were happening so i did miss alot. that was really hard on me since i use to go to EVERY function at the school. this year i went to 2 and the sad part about that is i had both kids in school this year. oh well cant cry over spilt milk.

shelby-linn (my 10yo) was 2nd in her class with a gpa of 96.1 and the boy that beat her only had 96.7. pretty cool huh? even with everything going on she did excellent in school. shelby-linn is getting help with her anger tho. she gets real upset and tries to spank her brother and step bother. she feels out of plce around her daddy's house from time to time. (since he's not her real father) and takes it out on the boys. but she has done great here lately.

triston lost his second front tooth on "water day" at school. i got the call while i was at work. so now my poor baby is missing both his front teeth and he looks adorable when he smiles ear to ear. see he lost his 1st front tooth about 3 years ago when his cousins big head (ha ha) hit him in the mouth. and this year at water day he was sliding down the big blow up slide and he was smiling and his tooth got caught on the net and he came down but his tooth stayed in the net. OUCH!!!!! huh? but he doesnt mind that both are gone he said he kinda likes it cause he can suck his thumb better now. i know what ur thinking and yes hes too old to be sucking his thumb but if he wants to be 40 and going down the isle sucking his thumb then he can cause his mommy said so... lmao

and finally me.... well i have went from a size 5 to a 0 from aug 06 to 1-07. who knew to lose weight all you had to do was get your kids taken from you while ur in a different state. lol isnt it nice to be able to joke about it? it really is. it means i have learned my lesson in many ways. went from brunnett to a blonde. in dec 06 met a wonderful wonderful man. hes learning to do whatr i say...lmao no i need to correct that....he hasnt learned shit. lol im learning that! no really he is a great guy. i met him in a club over here and we went out a few times then didnt see him for about a month ans on 12-14-06 he was at the club and i was with a friend and he wanted to go have coffee. i said no cause even tho i was with a friend that i couldnt and wouldnt leave with anyone else. who i came with is who i leave with. so the next day i texted travis and asked if he was drunk or did he really want me?! and he said "no i wasnt drunk and yes i want you in a bad way" so 12-15-06 we started dateing and have been ever since.

well ill stop here and write more later

well we have went thru another court date. i got my 10 yo daughter and my ex got my 4 yo son. the judge didnt want to decide on things i guess he just thought we would be happy one with each parent. well im here to tell you DONT FUCK WITH MY CHILDREN. hell has no fury like a mother scorned. my son is being miss treated by his daddy and step-mom. my 4 yo son is made to wear his 1 yo sisters diapers. they are sick people out there and im going to get even with them all. if anyone has any suggestions i would love to hear them.

yall have a blessed day and remember love all children.

Well when you think things can't get any worst they do. Yesterday I was served with papers telling me that I could not go get my children from their father tomorrow. In fact, it states that I am restrained from contacting them at all. You see my ex-hubby Ryan Stott asked me to give him custody of the kids so he didn't have to pay childsupport and I told him no. WHO WOULDN'T??????? He lets his new wife og about a year or so make the decisions around his house. The bitch hates me and they know the one and only way to kill me is to take my kids from me. My poor babies think they are coming home tomorrow and they are not. When they find out they can not come home to mommy they will just explode. You see, when i dropped them off Sunday evening my 4 y/o son begged me to pick them up immediately when i drop them off. I told him i coudnt because it was his daddys month to have them, but i would pick them up in 8 days. He said ok. But that his daddy told him that when i dropped them off that they would never see me again. and he cried while i dropped him and my 10 y/o daughter off that sunday at 6pm. i told my son not to worry about it because he would see mommy again and he could live with me forever if he wanted to. and he said good cause he didnt want to live with daddy forever like daddy said that he and sissy would.

I tell you that if this has not happened to you; i am here to say that you wouldnt even wish this on your worst enemy. this hurts just like if those kids were dead. it really does. i walk around all day just wishing i could smell them, touch them, hold them, look at them, kiss them, love them but it just doesnt happen. i go to court on the 4th of august for the restraining order hearing. that is to see if they can keep me from the kids until the custody hearing whenever that is going to be. Not saure what the hell he told them to get a restraining order against me. the only thing anyone could ever say bad about the way i am with my children is that I love them too much as my mother stated once.

How can I get out of this horrified hell that he has put me in?

Hello everyone. I am in West Valley, UT doing my truck driving school. It is soooooo beautiful here. I cant believe my eyes of the views i see. The mountains are great here. I went up one and got to see a waterfall. My god i am in heaven...... I am doing great on the written and the driving part so far. Got a 4.0 ave so far. Just got the CDL driving test left to do and that is on Wednesday. Wish me luck.

Not all things have been great though. I came up here with my Husband and things were really good at first. Then something happened a week ago Saturday. I had school that day for 14 hours and david was off. I guess he was bored and wanted to be with me all day. I wanted that too. We were having such a great time together. I mean everything was great. Then he came to the Backing Range and was trying to help me. I asked he to not tell me how to do it but to just watch and tell me what i done wrong if anything at all. Well, he started yelling at me and I asked him to stop. then i ignored him for a while and he pulled my hair so hard that my sunglasses came off my head. then i left with some friends and went to eat supper. by the time i got back i had to go back to the backing range and finish class. david showed up out there and asked me to talk so i did. he told me that i was embarrassing him and i said that i wasnt he was the one embarrassing the both of us. i also told him that i will not tolerate him hitting me anymore and he said oh yeah? then punched me in the gut so hard it made me sick. Of course the cops were called since one of the instructors saw what he was doing to me and she said i had to do something. i wasnt at first because i didnt want to leave school. she told me not to worry about it. so david sirmons went to jail saturday night and got out monday night. then he walked to my school and got escorted off the property and dropped off at the bus station 50 miles away so he wouldnt walk back again. it was really surprising to see about 40 people stand around me when he walked out of the school that monday night. most didnt even know me and they still made sure i was okay. it was almost like the great wall of china. all i could see was a mutlitude of butts in front of me...lol but it was a great feeling of security with them there.

had to change my cell numer because david wouldnt quit calling. he even tried to get me kicked out of school by telling them about a warrant i had that i didnt know about. well, it worked for a little bit. they told me to leave friday afternoon, but said when i fixed it to come back. i told them that i wasnt leaving utah until i fixed it and i would be back monday. so tomorrow im going back to school and finish on time. ha ha ha david sirmons you didnt win this one.

Little note to every woman out there.......If he hits you once he will hit you again. They really dont change no matter what you do or dont do. If if you love him more than anything in the world stay away. Be strong.

Well, enough of the bad shit. Have a safe and great day.