If you are one of the two people who might have occasion to read this neglected, ignored, rundown blog then I have good news for you. It's disappearing. Yahell is shutting down 360 for good, and I fully intend to let this blog be vanished right along with it.

Seems appropriate somehow. I've been on this big "turn over a new leaf" kind of kick this year, so it really doesn't pain me at all to let this repository of oddity and frustration expire.

So, to all those who know me, you know how to find me, and to everyone else...

so long.

You betcha. This is an idea espoused by many christians. God will provide. The idea being that all a person really has to do in life is to live righteously and the good lord will take care of all the minor details. In this respect I agree with the christians, at least in as much as their doctrine allows. Let's assume for the moment that every word in the bible is true, and it is a tome of certain facts.

In the beginning god made everything. Including humans. For some amount of time god was happy with what he had made, and he treated man well. Gave him a cool garden to live in, chick to bang, whatever else. Good times. He also trusted man, and this is the important part, he trusted man to do one little simple thing. I don't know if god assumed man was worthy of being trusted, or if he was just out to make a point, but either way, man betrayed that trust, and so god kicked his ass.

Threw him out of the garden, left him wandering in misery, etc etc. Even went so far as to destroy the vast majority of humans that were alive at the time by drowning them to death. Very similar to what persons of low conscience do to unwanted cats.

After a while he got over being pissed about what a shitbag man turned out to be, largely because a certain few humans showed some promise, so he decided to show these people some amount of favor. Nothing too fancy of course, nothing like the original paradise, but enough to let them know he cared. Power, prosperity, and plenty. But he remembered what happened the first time so this time around he made a set of rules, set them in fucking stone so that man would not be confused, and gave them a chance to redeem themselves.

Naturally, they fucked it up. A great deal of time passed with man screwing up, then begging for forgiveness. Again and again man would shoot himself in the foot, only to come running back to god to get him out of whatever mess he had gotten himself into. The good lord put up with this for a while. I think it gave the almighty a grin that the early jews were such a savage people, given to slaughtering their enemies wholesale, and since god was bitter about man from the start he appreciated their gusto.

But it wasn't working out. Maybe he got bored with the jews, maybe he saw promise in other people- who knows. The point is the old way of doing things wasn't cutting it anymore. And after however many thousands of years of trying to instruct man from on high, with virtually no success, he decided a more direct interface was needed, so he just came on down in the person of jesus christ. He spent about thirty years down here, the high points being recorded for posterity, extolling the virtues of righteous living as he saw it. Peace, charity, chastity, poverty, love, and all that jazz.

And man crucified him for it.

It's important to note that this is what the christians believe. I can only assume at what god's reasons would be for going through this nonsense, but this is what they believe. They believe that after everything god has had to put up with from us that some of us will still get to heaven and live in paradise forever, and according to the bible they're right. According to the scripture if you live according to the teachings of christ, and I mean literally follow what he specifically said to do, then yeah you got a shot at eternal bliss.

Course, the reality of it is that if that's the only way to get to heaven, there won't be many christians going. Look at it from god's perspective. He literally comes down here, tells us all that we're supposed to ignore money, not be concerned about sex aside from the need to propogate the species, to not give any thought to anything aside from celebrating the glory of his creation, in every part of his creation, and if we can do that he will just take care of everything else. He'll even look after us after we die.

And the christians show up to talk about this every sunday in $50,000 cars, still hung over from the saturday night good times, to a building that costs more to build than it would take to feed all the homeless in their community for fifty years... They obviously don't get it.

Which brings us back to god providing. According to the bible, and we're still assuming that the book is all true here- according to the bible what the good lord is gonna provide for all the people who don't get it, who have refused for however many millenia not to get it, after he's bent over backwards in every way he can to help them to get it, yes! he will provide for these people. Everlasting agony in fire will be what these ignorant backward monkeys will reap for their willful stupidity.

See, I like that part. Almost makes me wish the bible was true. I'd love to see Joyce Meyer trying to explain to the architect of the cosmos that she can't go to hell because she arrived in a lexus.

"You will know them by their fruits"... Saw that on a religious billboard the other day. Means you can tell what people are by watching what they do (and ignoring what they say). I agree with that. And I can tell you I know a whole shitload of people who go to church, but I know very very very few christians. (and none of the ones I'm aware of have either the inclination, or the money, to rent a goddamn billboard btw) In all honesty, if the bible were true, and all of that shit was the way it's gonna go down... I suspect in that scenario we'd see as many, if not more "satanists" in heaven than hypochristians.

Course, this is all a moot point. In reality if you believe in a "God" at all the only reasonable viewpoint to take is that God is an insufferable and indiscriminate dick that makes everyone miserable.

Which just makes the christians that much more retarded. Poor clueless assholes.

These are troubling times. On that much at least, I think most reasonable people can agree. Economic upheaval. Vietnam ver: 2.0 in the middle east. Unemployment rates soar. Documented mental illness at an all time global high. From backbone financial institutions, established religion, and the most powerful governments in the world, to the smallest of small businessmen and their children, even the bums under your local overpass- everyone can feel the destabilizing effect of the uncertain times that we live in today.

And of course, all of this is just added strain to the normal stress and hair pulling of everyday life. Husbands and wives betray one another. Children lie to their parents. Bosses fuck over their employees, and workers leave management hanging. The government taxes your ass and a gallon of milk costs too fucking much. Personal goals often go unachieved, alongside forgotten dreams- sacrificed to the pressure of the daily grind.

It's enough to make a person feel overwhelmed.

I've had more than one conversation lately with folks who feel like the weight of the world has become somewhat cumbersome. I feel for these people, largely because I can sympathize with them. There's a lot of bullshit in life that even the most humble person has to endure every day just for the privilege of living in this society. It can get to ya after a while. Some time ago I developed my own quaint philosophy about dealing with it. In relating it to others over the past few weeks I've decided to give it a name, and publish it here, owing to several recommendations to do so.

I call it the volcano philosophy, and it's a simple idea. The idea is that people get to feeling overwhelmed because they lose perspective. Often a very simple problem, or small trouble, can appear to be the end of the world, but just because it's the biggest deal in your world, doesn't necessarily mean it's a big deal. The proof lies in the example of the volcano.

If you lived on the very lip of an active volcano, and the word has just come down that it's about to blow, in that moment you will find perspective. I promise you, when the mountain starts rumbling, threatening to explode the fiery guts of the earth in revolt against everything between itself and the sky, you won't be able to give one tiny shit about whatever it is that's bothering you. You would trample all over people that you don't really give a fuck about, you would be incapable of entertaining preoccupations, and you would simply flee from the very big deal that an erupting volcano can be.

Ever notice how you can tell your pals about your troubles, and they're like, "yeah that sucks man." But you tell those same people, "Hey man, that volcano next to the house? Yeah uhh... its about to go, and we're all gonna fuckin die." They wouldn't patronize you. Know why? because exploding volcano = big deal. Your personal problems? Problems that are likely very similar to the problems that every other ordinary person experiences at one time or another? Yeah... not so much a big deal.

There are exceptions of course. Things can crop up that would make a person unconcerned with the volcano. If things of this nature happen, you will know it, you won't have to have anyone agree with you that this is a big deal. There are times in a person's life when you would just as soon stand right where you are, facing the heart of the Big Wu, almost wanting it to engulf you. Similarly, there are times when you will feel like you're trapped, with no way to escape the wrath and destruction, pinned as it were, against the rock and the hot place. Some people would scream in blind terror. Some people would rage at God for creating such an uncaring thing as a volcano. Some people would run in their hut and slam the door, thinking any shelter is better than no shelter, even knowing it won't matter. Some people would just fucking jump in.

Meditate on this. Meditate deeply on the volcano. Ask yourself, are you running from it? Do you feel trapped against it? Do you fear it? Do you accept your fate? Are you hiding in your house from the certain doom? Meditate on this until you know where you stand with the Big Wu. Then open your eyes and realize...



There is no volcano



You're still right where you were. The earth isn't going to explode. Death is not raining from the sky. Realize that whatever is bothering you- just because it's the biggest deal in your world at the moment, that doesn't mean it's the end of the world. Troubles pass. Life goes on. This is true even in the case of exploding volcanoes.

One notable exception is of course people who actually literally do live on the lip of an active volcano. For you, the solution to your big problem is simple... Move.

cheers

I wish I were in a position to obtain a nuclear weapon.

If I had to point a finger at the one thing that makes life on earth the most intolerable, it would be simply this; very little ever makes any actual sense. So much of what people do is based on hope and belief, more often on desperation and necessity. So little of what actually occurs finds its roots in reason. What's remarkable is that when someone does do something purely out of a sense of reason they're often met with a feeling of humor in the relating of it later, as if it's somehow funny to do something because it makes sense.

What I'm saying is that it makes people smile when things make sense to them. Makes me happy anyway. When I can discern the heads vs tails of a thing that Ive been troubling over it makes me giddy. I think the reason why is because, well, not much ever makes any fucking sense. When you find something that actually does seem reasonable it makes you laugh.

Sad world we live in really.

There is no faster way to make yourself miserable than to sit quietly and think. I say that with the voice of experience. I suspect most of the noted historical thinkers would agree with me on that one. Being well versed in the language and method of philosophical pursuit means only that you will arrive at the same consternating conclusions that much faster than some uneducated counterpart. Example:

Why are soap bubbles round? Because they are.

Is there a god? No one knows.

Are we alone in the universe? Maybe.

I gave up trying to answer the big questions a long time ago. Beyond what we can define nothing can be known so what's the point? Anyway, it's task enough to try to make sense of what's happening right in front of us on any given day. I spend a good deal of my time, like I always have, trying to unravel the mysteries that surround me. Why do people do the things they do? That's a whole lot bigger question than what it might seem at first. I can save you many years of observation, experimentation, study and reference, etc etc and just present you with the only reasonable findings to be had on the subject.

Why did that person do that thing? Because they were inclined to.

Why were they inclined to? Because everything about their lives up to the point of their inclination to do it inclined them to do it.

Why would their lives have inclined them to do this thing? Several answers could be presented here, but only two have merit. 1: Because god wanted it that way. 2: No one knows. (take your pick)

In either case... a "Welcome to Earth", is in order.

so long as creatures persist in being unreasonable by nature, regardless of how well thought out the world they live in might be, the consecutive result of reasoning upon the comings and goings of all creatures will be confusion, with the ultimate end arriving at length in madness.

You people are impossible. Difficult to the point of utter exhaustion. Even if I do manage to figure out one small thing or another, there is still the great yawning unknown laid out before me- untouched, unanswered, and unexplored. Unreachable really. It seems to me more and more that the biggest favor I could do for my fellow man in general would be to cease his madness, before he makes it worse on himself.

Which brings me back around to wanting a nuke.

I know I know, it may seem severe. It may seem like killing the patient to cure the disease, and maybe that's an apt analogy, but to extend the analogy a bit- it would in fact cure the disease. Often times when I'm struggling to sleep I think to myself how easy it would be to think of only the best things in my life if I were laying on a ticking thermonuclear device. If I knew I only had five minutes to think before the end of all things I think I'd meet the end with a smile on my face.

Part of that smile would be knowing that I would take so many of you with me. Infants sleeping in their cribs. Puppies playing in the backyard. Old people who have lived good lives and who are praying for their reward. Young people who have all the potential that this life can offer. The cool breeze moving through the blooming grass. It would all go with the savages and fiends, the screaming victims, the power of money, and the impotence of the law. The murderers and rapists, the cowards and the cowed, the unjust and those that justice has ignored; all blasted away forever. Inhaled by the fire would be dreams and aspirations together with desperation and all misery.

And with one great blast of an exhale, all you fuckin idiots would be silent forever. The only problem lies in finding a bomb big enough for everyone. I think the good in the deed would far outweigh whatever wonder may be lost.

And for all you people reading this thinking, "that's one messed up little weirdo. Thank god he's not in charge of our nuclear defense systems"... for all those, I leave you with the opinion of a thinker from many centuries ago, arriving, as I have, at the conclusion that you would all be better off...

"Wretched, ephemeral race, children of chance and tribulation, why do you force me to tell you the very thing which it would be most profitable for you not to hear? The very best thing is utterly beyond your reach: not to have been born, not to be, to be nothing. However, the second best thing for you is: to die soon."

-Aristotle




Cheers