In my infinite quest to find knowledge, I posed this question on Yahoo's new answer.yahoo.com website:

Is it possible to change one's homosexual tendencies? If so, how?

A wise man answered the question with dignity and style. Here is his answer:

"Why are we always trying to label ourselves as one thing or another. Other than for marketing purposes, there is no reason to believe that the word homosexual means anything other than an action. It should not be a description of a person. We are far too complex to fall in these types of categories. People have tendencies for many things. Accept who you are and fill your life with satisfaction. Society has created categories for people. My opinion is that there is no one category for me.....gay, religion, or anything like that."

Today I said "no". Everything in me wanted to say "yes", but I said "no". This does not happen very often. Usually I've given in to my minor whims and fancies: four scoops of ice cream instead of one, etc. Saying "no" has not been part of my rhetoric. But, today I told myself "no". It feels good. It feels right. I didn't follow my desires, my animalistic urges, but I did what I thought was best...healthy for me and others. Perhaps there is hope for me yet. Maybe, I am not as lost as I had so previously ascertained.

These past few months have been like an emotional roller coaster...giving in to desires, throwing caution to the wind (so-to-say). This left me feeling maleable, a piece of puddy without form or structure. To me, a man has structure. I haven't feel like a man in a long, long time. Mind you, I have the correct plumbing, but I have felt as if I was missing something essential. A man has the ability to say "no" to himself and others. Even, when his animalistic passions advise him to say "yes". In my life, it hasn't happened often. But, today is a day in my own personal history book. I said "no" to myself...for the betterment of another.

This is not an unconscious plea for accolades, nor am I bucking for sainthood. I just made a wee bit of progress today. Slight progress in the grand schema of life. Miniscule in the hearts and souls of many others. But for me, I chose friendship and what I thought would be best for the other person.

Some may not understand what I am saying, for I am speaking in cloaked terms. Some may understand and not agree. There are those who say, "If it feels good, do it." I used to belong to that club. But, my sentiments are slowly changing. Who knows, tomorrow I may feel different. But, today I said "no" to myself for the betterment of another. Maybe this is what it means to be a human being?

Do human beings have souls?

If so, what would be an adequate definition of a human soul?

Is the human soul a part of my conscience...guiding me toward good and away from wrong? Is it my unconscious psyche providing me with information on how I need to live my life in order to achieve the greatest meaning?

Are the feelings I have emminations of my soul? If they are connected, are feelings then the language of my soul.

I wonder.

I have been taught that the human soul exists. It is the eternal part of who I am...the "godly", the sacred aspect of my being. It moves beyond human time constraints and connects with the creator.

The most primitive societies believed in the spirit of humans and animals, even inanimate objects carried the essence of spirit.

If this is so, how do I connect with this essence? How do I allow my life to be guided by such a force? How can I trust that I am following this spirit?

My beliefs and actions must be based on something more than personal whims or desires. I am discerning if there are true objective moral norms that apply to everyone OR if the universe is totally subjective. Are there boundaries for my behavior, OR do I have absolute freedom to do what I want, when I want, and for how long I want to do it? I do not have absolute external freedom. Absolute external freedom ultimately interferes with the personal freedom of others. If I want to drive on the opposite side of the road, I have the freedom to do so. However, my choice will interfere with opposing traffic. Absolute internal freedom is another question. If this universe is one cohesive piece of celestial fabric, then the rules of the larger world must also pertain to the inner world. Therefore, do I have absolute inner freedom? I can believe what I want. I can feel what I want. I can think what I want. But, are there consequences (just like the prior opposing traffic example) that will ultimate destroy my being? Perhaps the question should be, "Is there a purpose for my existence within this world?" My actions would then need to be geared toward unfolding my purpose. Freedom and purpose must go hand-in-hand.