My preference is for Yahoo 360. I like the avatars and I like that my blog is already set up here but I'm going to be blogging over at multiply for awhile. I'll leave a link to my page here and that way any of my friends still here at 360 can hop on over and read if they wish....Yahoo has just been doing odd things...it takes forever to load my page and sometimes I'll post and then my post won't show up for a day or so...anyway so here's the link to my multiply page...happy blogging....

http://thankfulrunnergirl.multiply.com/

Until I return keep on running...and giving thanks!

Well we did indeed have a wonderful Easter, time with my mom and aunts and cousins at my mom's house really lots of fun to watch the egg hunt and do our traditional confetti eggs! So from the time Lent begins to the week or so before Easter it is tradition in my family to begin collecting Easter Eggs. When we use eggs instead of cracking them open we make just a tiny hole in the top and then shake the yolk and whites out through this openning, rinse the egg, let it dry and then we color them and add confetti. On Easter day we hide the eggs and then it begins....all out war as we run around cracking the eggs on our loved ones head's :-) Some years perhaps a sneaky cousin will put flour instead of confetti, not nice! Sometimes people will put money, not us but one of my cousins told me today that her family did...anyway we had lots of good food, good visiting and good fun...a nice way to celebrate Easter Day! He is Risen! (He is Risen Indeed!) For those of you who don't know the Easter tradition of my church we celebrate Easter for 5 weeks :-) The Easter season ends with Pentacost, which is the celebration of the day the apostles received the gift of the Holy Spirit. I received the gift of the Holy Spirit when I was 15, which is called confirmation and I remember it very vividly...I was waiting for something wonderful to happen or I should say I just knew something wonderful was about to happen and sure enough it did.

Easter is such a special time for us and especially Jason. Jason was baptized, confirmed and received his first communion at Easter day 1995, the year we got married. He says he can remember very clearly a wave or rush go through him and he couldn't really describe it other than as he felt "new". I understood what he was talking about because when I was about 7 or 8, can't remember the exact age anymore I felt that same "rush", it's hard to explain but there is nothing like it and I remember after Jason was baptized he looked so happy, so elated and the first thing he told me was, "Wow, that was incredible!" Hmmm...those are good memories...

Sorry about the moody blog yesterday, not all memories associated with Jason and I getting married are happy one's for lots of reasons...Jason's mom had just been divorced when Jason and I started dating and her youngest son had just left to join the marines and she wasn't in a good place when I first came into the picture and what started out as a good relationship progressivley got worse and to tell you truth I don't really know when or how exactly it all happened...and isn't that the pathetic part of the whole thing? Jason was 22, I was 23, his mom didn't want him to get married so young and didn't do anything really to support our marriage. She through me a bridal shower but let a friend of hers who I did not like run it and I'm pretty sure she knew I didn't like her friend and she did not think I was grateful enough to her for the "party", petty stuff like that, she wanted wedding pictures but didn't offer to pay for any, stupid things, offered to help with favors after saying she only wanted to show up at the wedding and not be bothered with anything since she had boys, complained about too many people coming to the rehearsal dinner which kept my godparents from coming because they felt bad. (Our rehearsal dinner was at Round Table, hey we love pizza and I didn't need anything fancy or want anything fancy, too be honest I didn't even know there was such a thing as a rehearsal dinner until I was in my friends wedding the year before, so funny) Just stupid, stupid, stupid, things...maybe I'll remember some more of them later on...like I said it's a loooooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnggggggggggg story I don't even think that's an eighth of it...

And since today was such a wonderfully wonderful day I would like to end on a high note.

Today I give thanks for a wonderful Easter Celebration with my family both church and home and of course for the wonderful gift our Father in heaven gave us, His only Son that we might live and have eternal life...For the wonderful promise of Easter and heaven to look forward too...IGT!

I haven't been thankful for Laina completed her first race 1/8 of a mile and got 2nd in her division :-) Ha! We have her first medal hanging on our mantel...

Mom and Dad finished their 4.0mile event in 37:23 also a decent time for them...This was on Saturday at the Local St. Patrick's Day Run...I suppose I really should have worn some green but I also wear the same shorts and hat when I race...superstitious I suppose...

Today...we have just returned from visiting my in-laws and as much as I love my nieces I have the opposite feelings for my in-laws...I ALWAYS leave from visits with them pretty much feeling like a nothing as no one talks or visits with me, no one asks how I am doing, etc.. etc...all the polite conversation that usually takes place never with me so like today I usually end up outside with the kids, sometimes my sister-in-law will come out and we'll say a few words but nothing really...It's been almost 15 years that in some way or another I've been part of that family well geez can I even say I'm a part of it? Mostly just an outsider looking in, puts Jason in a rather awkward spot I suppose, who doesn't love their family, no matter how crappy they are, that's not nice I know but I don't really feel very well tonight combination of trying to fight off a sickness and my "visit", can you actually call it a visit when no one talks to you? It's a long story my relationship or lack of one with them but really am I that horrible of a person?

I don't think I'm a perfect person but really most people usually like me at least enough to say, "hello, how's the family? how's work?how's Laina?how's vacation going?did you go anywhere?did you have fun?those cupcakes were really neat looking how'd you make them?did you make the frosting from scratch?are you going to church tomorrow?are you going over to your mom's?etc..etc..etc..is it really that hard to find things to talk about? Oh, my in-laws the whole thing you know just makes me sad, not even mad. Jason say's I'm a different person around them, guess I'm a cold hearted "fill-in the blank" cause I really can't thing of any other reason to ignore someone who is at your house visiting for a special holiday...at least I get to spend Easter with my mom and Laina and family that talks to me...it's always been my favorite holiday...too bad his mom wasn't off at disneyworld like she was last year...

Hmmm...not a very inspiring blog tonight is it? Sorry :-( I'm praying I can fight this whatever off so I can enjoy Laina's first Easter with her...

So for races won, completed and visits ended...IGT!

Today is Holy Thursday or The Mass of the Last Supper which I usually really really enjoy attending. It's one of my favorite services all year as Easter is my favorite Holiday, but this year I'm afraid I won't be able to attend. Laina is little and frankly gets bored easily and tonight's mass is about an hour and a half long, maybe I'll stop by for adoration later tonight, won't be the same but at least I'll have a few bits of time to go by and meditate on the sacrifce that will be made on Good Friday. I've been reading several books....that Oprah book A New Earth by that Tolle guy in which he seems to think, if I'm reading him right, that organized religions have missed the point. I think people have missed the point.

I think sometimes people see religions, for instance the Catholic religion and think all they do is teach that if you do this, this, this and that you will go to heaven and don't do this, this, this or that or you will go to hell or purgatory. If you want to call them "rules" and "regulations" I suppose you certainly could but really they are more like guidelines to follow to help you to be the best person you can be.. Jesus said basically and I'm paraphrasing...that he wanted us to be on fire, to give everything we had to help people find Him and that doesn't have to be through preaching or recruiting it can be done by simply living your life and when people look at your life and wonder what exactly you are doing they will eventually figure out, if you're doing it right, that you have some sort of moral compass that you follow...If you were raised Catholic it's very easy to get caught up in the "rules", actually I imagine for any religion that would be so and forget why you follow them in the first place and the reason to follow them is to be closer to Jesus Christ our Savior....realizing of course not every one believes this to be true but just because you don't believe something doesn't mean it's not true..

I guess if I could have any wish granted for this Easter season, which actually last 5 weeks in our church, it would be that something deep within people would be stirred to become the best they could be...In my personal opinion that journey is made ALOT easier with Jesus by your side but realizing people take different paths to hopefully the same end...Pope John Paul II acknowledged that there are possibly other paths to salvation, that Jesus is so compassionate and loving that he put these paths in place to save even those who like Thomas could not believe without "seeing". I hope that every person finds a path to salvation and I know what some protestant religions/evangelicals would say...there is only one way to salvation but I'm not sure that I'm willing to acknowledge that God, the God I know anyway would not want all His children with Him.

I asked Jason today if he thought heaven was a place or a state of mind and he said, "I think it's a place that our human mind cannot comprehend." Really doesn't that speak to faith, belief in something that is so much bigger than us that we can't begin to fully comprehend it and some of us are Catholic, some are Buddahist (sp?), some are Hindu, Muslim, etc..etc...all looking for salvation...all ostensibly wishing for the same thing I think, peace, love and goodness for the world...

My experience has told me that there is a God and that His son Jesus Christ died so I might live forever. My heart aches today for my Baby P. I begged Him to let me keep her. I held a rosary on my belly all night and He did not answer that prayer but opened another door and for me there is no greater evidence of the love of Christ than my daughter Laina who He has entrusted me with after many many years of waiting...God does not always say yes but if you listen to Him and follow the "rules" not because you have to but because you love Him it makes life easier even when things aren't so easy...

Anyway just some thoughts floating around in my head today...Easter is a special Holiday for millions of people around the world and should be respected and valued and even if you don't celebrate Easter, like my atheist friends, you could celebrate family, friends, the beginning of spring, the newness of life...these are all good things to celebrate(and really what is Easter but a celebration of life, new beginnings,the old falling away, the chance to start again, another new year in a way)...I wish everyone could experience the Easter I experience every year...

For Holy Thursday...IGT.