Dusting
 
 "A house becomes a home when you can write
 "I love you" on the furniture." AMEN !!
 And my house is sure a home!!
 
 I can't tell you how many countless hours
 that I have spent CLEANING!
 
 I used to spend at least 8 hours every weekend
 making sure things were just perfect -- 
 "in case someone came over."
 Then I realized one day that no-one came over;
 they were all out living life and having fun!
 
 Now, when people visit, I find no need to
 explain the "condition" of my home.
 They are more interested in hearing about
 the things I've been doing while I was
 away living life and having fun.
 If you haven't figured this out yet,
 please heed this advice
 
 Life is short. Enjoy it!
 
 Dust if you must,
 but wouldn't it be better to
 paint a picture or write a letter,
 or do some Bible study,
 spend time with a friend
 bake a cake or
 plant a seed, go play golf,
 ponder the difference between want and need?
 
 Dust if you must, but there's not much time,
 with rivers to swim and mountains to climb,
 music to hear, songs to sing and books to read,
 friends to cherish and life to lead.
 
 Dust if you must, but the world's out
 there with the sun in your eyes,
 the wind in your hair, a flutter of snow,
 a shower of rain.
 This day will not come around again.
 
 Dust if you must, but bear in mind,
 old age will come and it's not kind.
 And when you go -- and go you must -- 
 you, yourself will make more dust!
 
 It's not what you gather, but what you scatter
 that tells what kind of life you have lived.
 
 Live well, Love much, Laugh often!
 
 
Remember..
 A layer of dust protects the wood beneath it. !!
 (OR)
 Dust is God's protective covering for fine
 furniture! A wonderful view of life.

This is a little more 'honest' than I usually post, but it made me laugh, and it seems so much 'real' than some I've read. Don't be offended...it's all in fun! ~~~ tam

Are you tired of those sissy-ass "friendship" poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality? Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship:

1. When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.
2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
3. When you smile -- I will know you finally got laid.
4. When you are scared -- I will try to calm your nerves, unless it is something silly then I will rag on you about it every chance I get.
5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.
6. When you are confused I will use little words.
7. When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.
8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass, but then I will help you get up.

This is my oath..... I pledge it to the end. "Why?" you may ask; "It's because you are my friend".

This is TOO funny - type out the sentence you end up with. DON'T LEAVE ME HANGING ALONE~

Pick the month you were born:

January------I kicked
February-----I loved
March---------I smoked
April-----------I dry heaved
May-----------I choked on
June----------I murdered
July-----------I did the Macarena with
August-------I had lunch with
September---I danced with
October------I sang to
November----I yelled at
December----I ran over

Pick the day (number) you were born on:

1-------a birdbath
2-------a monster
3-------a phone
4-------a fork
5-------a Mexican
6-------a gangster
7-------my cell phone
8-------my dog
9-------my best friends' boyfriend
10-------my neighbor
11-------my science teacher
12-------a banana
13-------a fireman
14-------a stuffed animal
15-------a goat
16-------a pickle
17-------your mom
18---- ---a spoon
19-------myself
20-------a baseball bat
21-------a ninja
22-------Chuck Norris
23-------a noodle
24-------a squirrel
25-------a football player
26-------my sister
27-------my brother
28-------an ipod
29-------a permanent marker
30-------a llama
31-------A homeless guy


Pick the color of shirt you are wearing:

White--------because I'm cool like that
Black---------because that's how I roll.
Pink----------because I'm NOT a homosexual.
Red----------because the voices told me to.
Blue----------because I'm sexy and I do what I want
Green---------because I hate myself.
Purple--------because I'm cool.
Gray----------because I was drunk
Yellow--------because someone offered me 1,000,000 dollars

Orange -------because I hate my family.
Brown--------because I was high.
Other---------because I'm a ninja.
None----------because I cant control myself


Now type out the sentence you made, in the subject line. I can't wait to see what you guys get stuck with!