Well having seen many others migrate to Multiply as a blog platform, and discovering the massively clean import tool, I have moved this site to...

http://masadablog.multiply.com/journal

I may change my mind in here somewhere, but for the near future the above will be my "main" blog site with blogspot continuing to be my gamer blog.

So long and thanks for the fish!

I have been pondering for months now why the heck move to New Zealand. I've been troubled by the lack of concrete answers. It would be easy to tell you I am making more money, it is a solid career move, a beautiful country, a life adventure and it would all be true. But arguably... I could make even more money in the US, as a solid career move, in one of the many beautiful places in the US and still be quite adventurous. New Zealand was not required. So why?

I do not have a logical answer. But I do have an answer.

It is somewhat hard to describe. Let me start at the begining. Well before I ever considered moving Amy and I discussed what we might like to do with our life together. Neither of us felt tied to Kansas and we decided to dream a little. Out of that discussion we came up with places we'd like to live. We had no idea how we would ever be able to live in any of them, but we wanted to. One of them was, of course, New Zealand. A week later I attended an industry conference with some fellow data engineers from Telecom New Zealand. A week after that I had an offer to apply. I will call this "a moment of clarity."

Immigrating to a new coutry is amazingly hard. There are literally hundreds of pages of requirements. Initially I was daunted. But... due to the nature of the job I was being offered, there was an immigration short cut that bypassed all the worst requirements and secured approval in 45 days. In the process of our application, after being warned many times of how impossible rapid approval was, we were always immediately approved. At each of these moments of clarity I knew I was doing something I was supposed to do.

Mere days after I left my former employer, announcement flew about a change in CEO, coming re-organizations, possible buy-outs and my old job was eliminated. It was perfect timing.

I specifically chose Jan 2nd as my termination date to qualify for all the end-of-year compensation that might be given. But as an offshoot, I discovered only after the fact that this also extended my insurance coverage through the end of January--quite coveniently covering my family during the gap from Jan 2nd to Jan 14th when I started in Telecom. A moment...

Since then I have had many more moments. Last week while driving half lost at dusk I came around a mountain to see the full moon rising huge over the far ridge. It was perhaps one of the most beautiful scenes I have ever been given. I instantly felt a sense of calm knowing I should be here.

This morning on my usual walk on the harbor, I was watching this cloud play hide and seek with the sun. At just the moment I looked up a sunbeam poked through and shined brightly on my little patch of the pier. It quickly faded. I felt another moment. I happened to have my camera and I took a picture of it. It isn't a grand picture... but trust me... it was beautiful.

I still haven't come up with a good answer to why I am here. But I do know that I should be here.

Love you all. Miss you all. See you all real soon!

Since just one blog is not geeky enough... and since I obviously have too much free time... I've started a 2nd blog that will only be game oriented. Since most of the folks *really* interested in my personal/family life don't really give a hoot about my game life (or at least the minute details of my game life), I've decided to subdivide. Here it is...

http://masada-blog.blogspot.com

Cheers!

Too many people live their lives worried about “results-based outcomes.” We fixate on goals and the achieving of tasks. We focus on the destination always in a rush to get there and finally enjoy something. I suspect many folks are familiar with the old saying, “life is a journey not a destination.” Of course it seems obvious when you think about it. We spent much more time in the act of pursuing a goal than the miniscule moment of achieving it. This may be clear to some of you. But there is more to it that perhaps is not considered. What happens when you don’t achieve your goal?

There is a secondary trap of results-based thinking that even “life is a journey” folks often fall in to. This is the sense of failure at never reaching their destination. We mourn for our loss and our failures. All that could have been if only we had… Stop. Hold up for just a few minutes and look at this. Consider that whether you achieved the goal or not, you still spent a good portion of your life getting there—where ever you ended up. Life will never be a smooth transition from one happy event to another. Pitfalls are inevitable. No matter how much you planned or how talented you may be, things will not always work out. But that doesn’t matter. We struggle to find meaning in loss or failure. There is none—or at least there is just as much meaning in failure as there is in success. What mattered was life—that you were there to live it.

Without realizing it, all along your path, you have encountered many characters in your life story. Perhaps they seemed like small parts in your life. But what you don't know is if you may have accidentally played a large part in theirs. We have so little ability to comprehend the Grand Scheme. We only see our parts. But I can guarantee that even if you don't see it, your life has meaning to the world. Take heart that your story whether triumphant or tragedy has made the masterpiece of Life richer, deeper, more meaningful than anything we could have consciously done. A list of bullet point highlights makes for a poor life story. Be proud of your whole story. Share it with others. Laugh at its funny parts, cry in the sad parts, revel in its entire scope and compass, and know that all of it—every word—was worth reading. For the meaning of life is the joy of living it.